The Real Housewives of Atlanta – Reunion Part 1

Time for The Real Housewives of Atlanta snoozefest Reunion. They held the it at an Aquarium which was random, and distracting. I kept looking at the dolphin (shark?) in the background that was pressed up against the glass looking like it was trying to escape.

Kandi looked great. This new hair is such a huge improvement. She looked like a different person. Kim’s wig was a frizzy mess and looked like it came off the rack at the Halloween store. Sheree looked like she had a lion’s mane on her head. Everyone else looked nice. I especially loved Phaedra’s dress and earrings.

They talked a bit about fake boobs and donkey butts. After 3 seasons viewers still want to see Kim’s drivers license because no one with eyes believes she’s a day under 40. Andy asks Kim why everyone thinks she’s older than she really is. She says wearing too much makeup makes her look older. Andy asks why she continues to cake it on then. Kim asks “Does it look caked?!” and Andy immediately backs down from the question. Pussy. Yes Kim! It’s looks piled on, caked on, spackled on… And that mountain of cheap synthetic dollar store hair piled on top of your head isn’t helping either. And while we’re at it, you don’t look good in black.
There were no wig questions this time. But I still want a straight answer as to why the hell she wears the damn thing in the first place (and if she ever washes it – doesn’t look like it). And also why, with all the money she spends, she doesn’t invest in an expensive quality wig, because they do exist.

They replay a scene from season 2 that I had totally forgotten about where Kim’s psychic tells her that she is going to get involved in a new relationship and have a son within a year. Well, it looks like a Real Housewife actually managed to find psychic who knows what the hell she’s talking about. We still have to wait and see if she was right about the sex of the baby, but that was a pretty good prediction so far. Eat your heart out Allison DuBois.

Cynthia doesn’t regret getting married yet. Well… she doesn’t admit to regretting it. She defends her decision to get married and made the conversation mostly about their money issues while ignoring the fact that Peter really didn’t appear to have much respect for her. Cynthia still looked stressed and unhappy while talking about her wedding and marriage. At least she has a pre nup. I’d be willing to bet the marriage is already over but they’re keeping it a secret because she doesn’t want to admit that everyone was right and she made the wrong decision.

Nene swore that she doesn’t have a crush on Peter while the other women rolled their eyes at her. Cynthia said that Peter and Nene don’t even get along and Nene looked hurt by that statement. Nene is just waiting for the right moment to pounce and Cynthia knows it.

Phaedra explained canned food-gate and says that her husband jokes about growing up on canned food and packaged meat. She says that her comment was definitely not racist because racism implies hatred. I don’t think Phaedra hates white people. I think she hates her mother in law and that comment was a personal dig.

Nene said on twitter that one of her cast mates is a transsexual. Andy asked her who she was talking about. She wouldn’t say who, but also didn’t take back her words, implying that someone on the cast is in fact a transsexual. I assume she was talking about Kim. But Kim’s pregnant so that ends that argument.

We didn’t hear from Sheree at all except to talk about whether or not her arms are too masculine. She said that she doesn’t work out her upper body and that her arms are all natural. So maybe she’s the transsexual Nene was referring to in her tweet?

Phaedra brought pictures of herself on a horse to prove that she has in fact ridden a horse before. Ok. That proves that she competed in a horse show when she was younger. I see low jumps, an ill fitting jacket, and a white ribbon… A horseback rider, maybe. But a “true equestrian”? I don’t think so.

Phaedra still doesn’t understand why this isn’t a classy look. But they’re roses! How could a rose not be classy? She looked legitimately hurt that the other women were laughing at her.

Nene and Phaedra argue over whether or not they knew each other in Athens and who is more fabulous. They eventually agree that they have different definitions of the word “fabulous”. They also both seem to have different definitions of what it means to “know” a person. Phaedra says that Athens is a small town and although she was never friends with Nene (because Nene’s OLDER) she did know who she was. Nene still swears she never heard of Phaedra. Even after it is revealed that Nene called Phaedra years ago wanting to do a reality show, Nene still won’t admit that she knew who Phaedra was. OMG! Like everything else that happened in Atlanta this season, this argument is pointless and annoying. Nene is seriously getting on my last nerve right now.

Nene and Greg are still going through with the divorce. Nene refused to answer a question about whether or not Greg cheated while at the same time implying that he did. He is still living in the basement but has plans to move out now that he is broke and Nene is the one paying the rent. I always assumed that they only rent those big houses while filming and move to an apartment in the off season.

Then Andy wants to discuss the way Kim talks to her assistant, Sweetie. Phaedra put her lawyering skills to work and made a good argument for why Kim’s behavior is offensive to black women, and I do see her point. But the truth of the matter is that Kim is just a loud, rude, obnoxious woman. It has nothing to do with black, white, employee, friend… it’s just the way Kim is. And honestly, I didn’t see Kim talking to anyone else all that much more respectfully than how she talked to Sweetie. At least Sweetie gets paid to put up with it.

Nene claimed that her problem with Kim and Sweetie really wasn’t a race issue, but rather a human respect issue. LOL. That was funny coming from the woman who spent the season screaming in people’s faces and threatening to snap necks and pop out eyeballs.

And that was about it. A pretty boring reunion over all. Next week doesn’t look all that much better except that we get to see Kandi confront Kim about the Tardy for the Party money. But we already know how that’s going to go: Kandi is going to make a logical argument and Kim is going to act like she’s Godsgift to man kind and therefore she obviously deserves the majority of the money.