Vicky and Tamra head out to their romantic weekend in Cabo to repair the friendship that Simon so rudely got in the way of last year.
Vicky won’t shut up about Tamra stabbing her in the back and pouring salt in her wound. She brings it up every chance she gets. She reminds Tamra every 5 minutes about how much she owes her and even tells the hotel staff what an awful friend Tamra is.
When they get to their room Tamra runs out on the balcony and flashes her butt. Vicky sits her down and explains that they’re going to have to have some rules for this trip. Hmmm. Rules? Kinda like how Simona had rules? Maybe now Vicky is getting a taste of what Simon had to deal with.
I missed last week’s episode so here are two recaps in one.
Last week Chelsea continued to be a waste of space, except she actually left the house for once and went to a Lady Gaga concert with her two friends and stayed in a hotel for the night. All of which her dad paid for to reward her for working so hard while studying for school.
Adam moved out of Chelsea’s house and straight into another girl’s apartment. Apparently this girl never saw 16 & Pregnant because she doesn’t understand why Chelsea doesn’t want to let Adam take Aubrey for an entire weekend. Adam and the new girl discuss his child support payments. Adam does some math and realizes that over 18 years he will end up paying $52,000. He thinks that is incredibly unfair. The new girlfriend agrees and it looks like Adam finally found someone as stupid as he is to share his life with. I wonder if either of them ever thought about how much Chelsea’s dad is going to end up paying over those 18 years?
Adam then says what a shame it is that he doesn’t get to spend more time with Aubrey and how sad it is that he missed her first steps… as though it was someone else’s fault that he was hanging out with his friends instead of being a father for the last 9 months.I’m pretty sure Adam’s new found interest in his child is just an act he’s putting on for the new girl. We’ve watched nothing but episode after episode of Chelsea begging Adam to spend time with her and Aubrey. It never ceases to amaze me how some people can lie so brazenly while all their actions and words are being documented on national television, and how they still find people who will believe them.
I was bored yesterday and playing around on twitter when I checked my follow list and saw this person: @REALexHousewife following me. Interested, I clicked on the profile and read some of her tweets and followed the link to her facebook page.
This is Gina, the ex wife George Peterson who married Laurie from The Real Housewives of Orange County.
I tweeted to her asking what her story was, and we exchanged some tweets. She made some pretty serious accusations against her ex-husband George and the things he was doing to her children. Then Laure’s daughter @AshelyZarlin joined the conversation and told a much different story.
Gina claims that George is alienating her kids against her and using money and connections to keep her kids away from her. One of her many claims is that her daughter Bria is missing and the police are refusing to investigate.
The show starts and Bethenny is complaining. Shocker. Today she is upset because the fridge isn’t organized and Gina has too much food in there. Bethenny calls Gina a wolf like 10 times. I don’t even know if that was offensive or not because I don’t understand what that’s supposed to mean. It seemed like an odd thing to call someone.
Bryn will be crawling soon so Bethenny invites a baby proofing expert over to the house. She was probably expecting to buy some plugs for the sockets and call it a day, but the woman went around the house telling her how deadly and dangerous everything is. She tells Bethenny that she needs to get rid of the cable box, the house phone, the lamp, and the center piece on the table, and should block off her kitchen with iron bars, a padlocked entrance, and an alarm system because babies should never ever be allowed in the kitchen. I bet half of you had no idea what horrible dangerous parents you were until now. See what kind of valuable information you can learn by watching reality television?
When I was a kid I played with pots and pans and climbed on furniture so I guess it’s truly a miracle that I’m still alive today.
Bethenny decides to get rid of all her slutty lingerie because now that she has Jason locked down with a marriage certificate and a baby she see’s no need to keep things fun or interesting in the bedroom. And because she is such a good person, she donates her used underwear to Gina’s church.
I’m a horrible blogger, but I’m finally catching up so here are two recaps in one. I’ll be honest, the Bethenny recaps are a little hard for me to write because I’m not really enjoying the show as much as I thought I would. I definitely liked Bethenny a lot better on Housewives. But don’t start celebrating yet Jill Zarin! Just because I’m not crazy about Bethenny’s show doesn’t mean I hate you any less. You’ll get your turn soon.
So let’s start with last week’s episode. Bethenny and her makeup artist get a good laugh out of her attending the Top 25 Most Stylish New Yorkers party. That made no sense. I guess that was supposed to be one of those “I’m still relatable even though I’m going to a red carpet event” moments. But she’s been wearing designer dresses, Louboutins, and had Birkin Bags in every color since season 1, so the whole “I don’t know how to dress myself” act seemed… well… like an act.
Bethenny’s jewelry gay comes over and she says how great it is to have a guy who just stops by with satchels of jewels. I think we should make “satchel of jewels” the new catch phrase just to piss off Kelly.
Sorry I skipped last weeks episode. But it was a bit of a snoozer anyway, so I think I can get away with it. If I remember correctly it was mostly just Tamra pretending to be a lesbian and Vicky being annoying in Seattle.
The show opens with Alexis going over to Gretchen’s house. Gretchen still has a problem with the “princess” comment and wore a tiara in order to keep the argument going.
Alexis and Gretchen head out to go shoe shopping with the new girl Peggy. We met Peggy last week, she’s married to a younger man and her hair is in desperate need of a trim, or some layers, or highlights, or something, but other than that she seems nice enough. And she’s friends with Alexis so Vicky will probably hate her which is always fun. Gretchen and Peggy meet for the first time at the store. Peggy thinks Gretchen looks like she’s from Texas with her big hair, Gretchen thinks old women shouldn’t try to be “all that” by wearing short skirts. The scene would have been way more interesting if they had said these things to each other’s faces instead of in their interviews.
I know I owe you guys like 5743729 recaps. I apologize for allowing my real life to get in the way of my internet duties, I hope you all can forgive me. I’m going to start catching up right now. In the mean time, here is some stuff from youtube.
Most of you probably saw this because it’s been all over the news. A girl at UCLA posted a rant about Asians and now she’s famous… and getting death threats.
Why does this girl remind me so much of Jenn?
A couple video responses to her:
Charlie Sheen’s Winning Recipes:
A song made from Charlie Sheen’s quotes:
Kelly’s still at it! I might have to make some more quote bubble Youtube’s soon.
If you thought that Kelly’s hair looks the way it does because she doesn’t own a hair brush, you are wrong. She pays someone to make it look that way!
If you haven’t re-read the Jenneral Insanity blog since the beginning, you might want to take another look because it’s been updated a whole bunch of times. And if you haven’t read Jenn’s original blog called “Jenn’s World” from 2006 you must check it out! It’s like her Youtube video, but in text. I added her blog posts at the end of the INSANITY Blog, and as of now the links are still working and you can read what’s left of the original here.
I know Jenn has another personal blog out there somewhere. We all know she can’t control herself, she just smartened up and stopped putting her name on her sociopathic rantings. If it’s out there, I know my talented readers will be able to find it.
I hope everyone had a great weekend, and I’m going to catch up on my recaps asap!
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