The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills – Money Can’t Buy You Sanity

We pick up where we left off in the middle of the argument with Kyle and Kelsey’s wife (but let’s just call her Camille this time for the sake of convenience).

Camille is still sticking to her crazy version of events. Kyle doesn’t hold back on telling Camille exactly what she thinks of her. She says that she is either a liar or she hallucinated because there is no other explanation for what is happening. Lol!
Kyle asks her sister to step in and set the story straight since she was there during the original conversation. Kim can’t even get one complete word out of her mouth. Just a lot of umms and ahhhs. Kim is totally useless and just sits there and allows the argument to continue instead of letting the other women know that Kyle was right.

It turns out that Taylor is a little pot stirrer. She had been whispering in Camille’s ear and fueling the crazy flames with stories of the ladies’ “Machiavellic” plot to convince the world that Camille is insecure. Taylor is a professional social climber, so it only makes sense that she would take Camille’s side.

Taylor accuses Kim of being the first one to call Camille insecure. Kim suddenly found a voice when the blame was being put on her, and when she defended herself Taylor accused Kim of attacking her out of no where. Lol. Every person at this table is nuts except for Kyle and Lisa, who smartly decide to get the hell out of there.
It turns out that there was nothing but empty threats coming out of Taylor’s giants lips, so we never did get to find out what it means to pull some Oklahoma on someone’s ass.

We have a new saying: I feel like I’ve been shagged through a hedge backwards. I’m using that one some time in the near future.

Kyle isn’t sure if she should still go to the play because Camille might jump out from behind her seat and stab her. She decides to call her and see what she should do, but Camille doesn’t answer because she needs voice mail evidence to replay for people later.

Kyle eventually decides to go to the play because she found a really cute outfit and she wants to wear it. If Camille murders her, at least she’ll die looking good.

Back in her tiny cramped little apartment, Camille is telling her loyal subjects about being attacked by her so-called friend the night before. So now Kyle is her friend? Because she clearly said at the dinner table that Kyle was not her friend and that’s why she didn’t have a right to ask her what she was doing for spring break. It is exhausting trying to keep up with Camille’s ever changing version of reality. Camille says she is lucky to have her real friends there to help her get ready and not contradict her lies.

From Dictionary of pretentious bitches:

Friend n. (frnd)
1. A person who will always have your back and take your side because they rely on you for a pay check.
2. A straight male who you engage in a sexual relationship with, but who is not your husband.

When Kyle first said that she was concerned about how this fight would affect her husband’s business relationship with Kelsey I thought she was being a bit paranoid. But Kyle was right to be concerned. It hasn’t even been 24 hours since their argument and Camille is already talking about how they won’t be able to do business with Mauricio anymore. You could almost see her counting the money Mauricio would lose and brimming with glee at the mere thought of the arguments it would likely cause between Kyle and Mauricio. Her trained monkeys only encourage her awful behavior.

And once again we find ourselves sitting and a New York City apartment watching a mean self absorbed woman play a voice mail message on speaker phone. But honestly, this is like the least of the terrible things Camille does in this episode so it doesn’t seem like as big of a deal as when Jill did it.

I like Adrienne, but I’m skipping over her scenes because they were a little boring. But I would like to point out that she has a framed dress hanging on the wall in her hallway. Rich people are weird.

Next we get to see what’s going on with the husbands. I really like Mauricio. Joe Giudice could take some parenting lessons from this guy. He seems like a really great dad.

Yes…. a great dad indeed.

I think I changed my mind about Russel after watching him alone with his daughter. I think he might actually be a nice guy, just a little geeky and socially awkward. And after getting to know Taylor, I mostly just feel sympathy for him.

Camille is in the limo on her way to Kelsey’s play and she is discussing the other women with her human bobble head who sits by nodding “yes” to every insane thing she says. Together they come to the conclusion that Kyle must be jealous, and that is why this whole fight happened. There is just no other possible explanation.

The women all arrive at the play. Camille says hello to Kyle and then immediately turns her back. But she doesn’t just turn, she actually shifts her entire body in the seat until she is practically sitting backwards just to make a big point out of the fact that she’s turning her back on her. Then in her interview she calls Kyle a petulant child.

After the play Camille goes back stage to see Kesley. She kisses him on the lips and he immediately (instinctively?) pulls away from her, but then (in what seemed like a moment of “uh oh, I shouldn’t have done that on camera“) he goes in and gives her a big kiss on the cheek to make up for it. Then he thanked her for coming to the show which seemed like a weird thing to say to his wife and pushed her out of the room. He was literally guiding her out of the door with his hand.

This is how you kiss a friend:

This is how you kiss a lover:

Just sayin.

In her interview Camille brags about going back stage to meet “Kelsey Grammer”.
Um… am I the only one who didn’t think that the guy from Fraiser was an A-list celebrity? No offense to Kelsey… but A-list? Really?

The women then go to an after party at a club. When Taylor asks Camille how she felt about Kelsey’s on-stage kiss, she explains that it didn’t bother her because it’s just a stage kiss and doesn’t mean anything. Then to prove her point she grabs Kim by the face and kisses her on the lips. I guarantee you Camille was one of those college girls who used to make out with her friends at parties to get guys to pay attention to her.

In his interview Kelsey says: “I guess the best you can hope for in a long relationship is that you married somebody who’s decent and nice [he shakes his head “no” as he says this] There has been a lot of stuff that has been a challenge in our marriage.. and uh.. she has certainly been through a lot of travail”
TRANSLATION:  “Being nice and kind is a challenge for Camille. She has been through a lot of travail while trying to remain slightly more decent than swamp scum. I can’t take it anymore.”

I don’t know what is up with Taylor, but she makes some crazy looking faces every time Kim talks. I imagine her faces would be as hilarious as Fakedra’s if she weren’t so full of botox and fillers. I have a theory that maybe Taylor looks at Kim and see’s herself in 10 years and it terrifies her.
Have her lips been growing throughout this episode? They look bigger.

The women are back in Beverly Hills and Lisa invites Adrienne over for tea. It was comical watching how long it took her to walk across the street. I bet the trip from her bedroom to the front door alone takes 10 minutes.

Over at Camille’s she is reading The Art of War.
Sun Tzu says: The one who is married to the richer man shall be victorious in all battles.
RCH says: Camille was only holding that book to look cool in front of the cameras.

In her interview she says that women need to celebrate each other. Did she steal this line from Kelly or do all crazy people just think alike?
Bravo, can we please have a cross over show called “Camille and Kelly Go To Lunch”? I think it would be absolutely fascinating to watch a conversation between these two women.

Camille’s lover arrives and she tells him her twisted version of what happened at the dinner in New York. Her story is complete with tales of verbal assaults and psychological warfare. The only honest thing she said was that Kyle was there and that they had dinner. Pretty much everything else was a lie. Then Camille, oh one of the bulging eye balls, says that she thought Kyle’s eyes were going to pop out of her head.

The way Camille talks about Mauricio as though he is just another one of her many employees reminds me of the Will and Grace episode when the drunk one hired the gay one as her lawyer and then refused to go to a dinner meeting with him because “she doesn’t eat with the help”. But that was a comedy. This, sadly, is not.
Camille says that when she told Kelsey about the fight with Kyle he said that they would have to hire a new real estate agent. Kelsey seems like the type that would tell her whatever she wants to hear in the moment to avoid an argument but then totally ignore her wishes.

And as if she wasn’t already looking bad enough in this episode…. With only 5 minutes left in the show she goes ahead and hammers 100 more nails into the coffin containing her public image as she explains the social hierarchy and “pecking order” of Beverly Hills.
Basically, according to Camille, since her husband has Golden Globes and Emmys and Kyle’s husband only sells multi-million dollar real estate, Kyle should put her head down, speak when spoken to, and not make eye contact with Camille The Great.

Then Camille called Kyle pernicious three times. I’m not gonna lie, I had to look it up. And it is a word.

She then kisses her lover good bye, and he heads down to the guest house to wait for the cameras to leave. Who wants to bet this guy’s wife is filing for divorce any minute now?

Next week Kim gets electrocuted, Camille goes shopping, and Adrienne gets a surprise. Looks like it’s gonna be a filler episode.

 

BS Bravo Blogs: Kelsey’s Wife – Money Can’t Buy You Sanity… Or Accountability

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250 Responses to The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills – Money Can’t Buy You Sanity

  1. surfergirlcut says:

    Love your blog and love your wit….and yes taylors lips now have their own zip code.

  2. MickeyMouth says:

    I like the kissing comparison. Great blog! :0)

  3. pantsonfire says:

    I hate Camille- I hope she gets rocks thrown at her everywhere she goes. And I also hope Paris Hilton jumps her shit and trys to socially deconstruct Miss C. Wouldn’t you love an all out warfare from Paris defending her aunts? Mmmmmmm.

    • Miss Anthrope says:

      Maybe next time Paris gets busted for drugs she can tell the cops it was Camilles cocaine in her purse!

    • housewifeaddict says:

      Yeah – why haven’t we seen Paris kick some Camille butt in the press. How strange is that?

    • sophie says:

      Agreed! It’s not only who you are in Tinseltown, it’s who you know, who you’re related to….and the Richards sisters are related to American royalty.

      In the pecking order, I believe that little Camille from nowhere who was lucky enough to marry fairly well is below that of the Hilton Dynasty. Sure, Kathy Richards was lucky enough to marry well, but she married beyond extraordinarily well.

      I’ve known who the Richards sisters are my entire life. Never heard of what’s her name till this show.

      I believe Camille is rawther low on the pecking order scale amongst her costars. Right about where her friend Taylor is.

  4. Debbie says:

    RCH,
    I just saw your tweet with the link for this.. I’ve got to make dinner, but I waited for what seems forever for you to post this and had to read it now. Amazing job as always. However, don’t you think you’re being a little too pernicious in your recap of Kelsey’s wife’s behavior? ….Just kidding. ;-p Be back later, need to run.

  5. Tracy says:

    This is the only franchise left worth watching. Go RHoBH!

  6. Litsnitch says:

    I’ll watch “Camille and Kelly Go to Lunch.”

  7. cdnfillie58 says:

    Your blog makes it worth watching a second time, through your eyes LOL

  8. Alicia says:

    Love it! I soooo…..look forward to your recaps!
    Ummmm….Camille went to college? Lol!
    Also, I totally think you should pitch the idea to Bravo about Kelly and Camille having a crossover show! Now THAT would be hysterical!!!

  9. ilovelynn says:

    Yay! finally! worth the wait, never disapoints!

  10. RHofWhatever says:

    Camel Toe SO F’s her “friend” Nick. I have been in that situation before and the sexual tension is so thick you couldn’t walk through it!
    As far as Adrienne’s framed dress… it’s her wedding dress, and when I saw that I wished I was that rich so I could frame mine and look at it everyday instead of having it preserved in case one of my daughters might want to wearit 😦
    Kim needs to stop the passive agressive shit and grow some balls. Her not saying what she really heard was just a slap, and then the gifting at the table was pathetic.

  11. tweatcyn says:

    That was extremely pernicious RCH. Pernicious,pernicious,pernicious.

  12. Delia says:

    I absolutely LOVE reading your blogs! You seem to say what I am thinking and you manage to catch things that I missed. Please don’t ever stop!

  13. anna says:

    did anyone hear of the new fabulous “housewives” show vh1 is coming out with- mob wives! lmfao! http://blog.vh1.com/2010-11-18/mob-wives-coming-soon-to-vh1/ maybe they’ll cast dina?

    • It looks like they are only casting women who’s husbands are in prison. Maybe Teresa can be on season 2?

      • They already have Tiny and Toya on BET. Their hubby/partners are in prison. I think the series producer is non other than Phaedra. Some lawyer, huh?

      • ImaJillHater2 says:

        Hmmmmm… wonder if my neighbor will be featured?

        Three weeks after I moved into my house, I opened the front door at 6am on a Saturday morning to fetch the paper only to find the house across the street was swarming with agents wearing FBI shirts. In the middle of this circus was her husband in cuffs doing the “perp walk” to the curbside “paddy wagon”! (A quick internet search identified which NY crime fam he was a part of… as well as the capo of the crew he belonged to, who (coincidentally?) was cuffed at the same time in the next town over…).

        Gee, if my neighbor isn’t featured, wonder if my almost-sister-in-law will be on the show (she’d LOVE that – SO into pretending she’s Carmella). Hub just got out of prison for loansharking. (I didn’t need to search the internet to ID his peeps! They’re the same ones that some of my extended fam are “connected” to…).

        Huh? Who? Wha’? Me? I donno’ nuthin’!

  14. Sara says:

    Great as always! Hilarious! btw @askJillian used to go out with Camilles lover! She sure is making good use of her “word-a-day” calender! 😉

  15. WindyCityWondering says:

    Camille’s 15 minutes is almost over – seriously she will be fighting with herself!
    The next battle royale will be a real and good one – Kyle vs Kim!

  16. Miss Anthrope says:

    Camille has not matured at all since her highschool years. All that shit about people being jealous of her and the insane lengths she goes to to garner negative attention from women is totally reminiscent of 11th grade.

    Semi off-topic, but why the fuck do women who have plastic surgery go around thinking they are something to be envied? Sweetheart, you had to PAY to look that way. That’s like me taking credit for baking the delicious cake I bought at the bakery. Perhaps the plastic surgeon (in some cases…not in others) should have bragging rights. But with enough money, anyone can look like that if they want to. So just play with your plastic funbags and shut your trap already.

    Ok, now that that’s over…

    LOLZ at Taylor thinking that anyone should be afraid of her going “Oklahoma on their ass”. Give me a break. Her face would probably deflate, crack, and melt all at once with one bitchslap to the jaw.

    Is it just me or is her husband kind of….I don’t know….creepy? He’s got something so weird about him even when he’s not coming off as an abusive douche. I just get this vibe that maybe he stays up all night looking at animal porn on the internet or something. I hate every scene that he’s in. Partly because it’s a waste of air time and also because he “skeeves me out”.

    • Need a Hobby says:

      Uh, it’s not enviable, in fact it’s just tremendously nuts that someone, anyone would actually deliberately pay tons of money to look like an accident victim who had poor facial reconstruction surgery. And then it’s seriously disturbing that any of those chicks would regard it as something to be proud of.

      It’s like, creepy.

      (And of course, who wouldn’t want to see a Kelly/Camille cage match? Of course it would not be a fair match: Kelly runs in NYC traffic and manages to survive. Think of it, Kelly traumatizes NY cabbies. Now that’s scary.)

    • Animal porn! LOL
      I do know what you mean though about the creep factor. That’s how I felt in the beginning. But I’m starting to change my mind.

    • jana says:

      Who hasn’t matured? You just went 7th grade middle school for the sake of a laugh. I love watching commenters make a bigger ass out of themselves than the people we judge. Can you imagine watching someone on the screen behave like you just did? I don’t like him… no …I don’t know him, he’s just weird. Adding in the other comments you made. Please! Bloggers would crucify you. To the simple minded it’s more acceptable in text with no face or voice attached?

    • housewifeaddict says:

      He’s really beginning to grow on me. He’s got a social awkwardness that’s endearing. Plus he makes the little girl smile. I sure hope there is no animal porn in his closet 🙂

    • Daisy says:

      I like Russell. It’s Taylor I have a problem with. Russell, to my eyes, looks very uncomfortable being on TV with a woman he does not like at all calling herself his Beverly Hills housewife. He clearly can’t stand the sight of her….who could, she is really hideous. He loves his daughter, and so, things are good there when she is in the filming area, even though he still doesn’t like the camera.

      Taylor is a complete idiot. I saw right through that catfish-looking Oklahoma redneck the minute she flapped her….what do you call them?

      I do feel sorry for Russell. She probably did whatever she could to step on that ‘rung’ of the ladder, and he knows it now. I bet he actually hates her, if he could.

      • Daisy says:

        That sounded very mean. Please excuse me. I am trying to be objective among fellow hobby commenters. This episode just grinded my gears. All of that money, and not a thimble full of class from 3 of them.

        • housewifeaddict says:

          I’m mad at her too. She stirred up all that stuff with Camille, then pretended to smell like roses. Plus she’s always snarking on Russel to the camera. Who does that to their own husband if they are in a healthy relationship. Even NeNe doesn’t say much about Gregg – and she’s planning on divorcing him. And finally, I just don’t get why she’s so mean to Kim when she’s only met her once or twice.

          • Adgirl says:

            I like Russell, probably because my husband is a total geek too. Actually, they are usually really nice people (and extremely funny) if you can get past their dazed expressions in social situations.

          • I don’t get that either. She seems to have a real problem with her that just doesn’t make sense.

          • Daisy says:

            Here is my theory on why Taylor is mean to Kim…..Kim is an easy target and she readily exhibits low self-esteem. Kim and Taylor are identical on a psychosocial level; however, Kim has earned her position in social circles, Taylor married into it and would not be there if she had not.

            Taylor is trailer park, and no amount of botox and fillers will change what’s under her skin. She knows that and lashes out at Kim to give herself boosts. She is no different than Camille.

          • Sardonica says:

            Ruh roh, I snark on my husband all the time. I have been married 32 years… I married young like Lisa hahaha…good one. I am like 29 in Lisa years which would put me being hmmm carry the 2 …add 3 times…

  17. Brobee says:

    Loved the recap as usual! I too noticed Adrienne’s framed wedding dress on the wall in her bedroom. that’s a neat idea if you have money to blow. Now on to watching “Skating With the Stars” tonite. Wonder how Bethenny will fare? RCH will you be recapping that as well?

  18. Jenn says:

    I think I may be the only person who has this opinion but I don’t blame Kim for not sticking up for Kyle. Kyle is not a very good sister to her and tries to put her down whenever she gets the chance. I think there is a huge amount of sibling rivalry between the two and it probably stems back to when they were both child actors, because they were incase you hadn’t heard! I think Kyle may have had a bit of a complex when they were younger and has decided that pay back is a mo’ fo’.

    • I disagree. Kyle might be short tempered with Kim – but how can you not be? The woman is exhausting. I don’t think Kyle is a bad sister. It looks like she helps Kim out and holds her hand more than anyone should have to for a grown woman.
      But I don’t see any excuse for Kim’s behavior. Sister or not, fighting or not, she should have told the truth about what happened. She could have set the record straight but instead she sat back and watched the drama instead of trying to end it.

      • Tam5115 says:

        I agree. All Kim had to say, is that she never heard Kyle say what Camille was accusing her of saying. Simple. She was able to do that in her direct confessional, so what the hell?

      • WindyCityWondering says:

        Kyle has to raise her own family and still keep her sister Kim from falling apart, making stupid decisions and while she may get short with her – Kyle is always there for her. Kyle gives and Kim takes – why would Kim want to reverse the roles?

        • Sardonica says:

          It is Kyle who keeps telling us she has to take care of her sister. Makes one wonder. Kim looked like a deer in headlights. She froze

        • klmh says:

          Kyle to me is quite demeaning to Kim, on camera with or without others around. Bitchy and a know it all to her sister. I understand her frustration and her tie to her though. She needs to watch her temper. She can get hot really quickly and lashes out before thinking at times.
          Her relationship with Lisa however is funny friendly, great.

    • housewifeaddict says:

      I don’t think she did it on purpose. I think she just didn’t want anyone yelling at her. It’s too bad that she’s such a wreck. She should have never done the show.

      • oldcrone says:

        I agree!! I think the level of drama that was already going on at that table was making her kind of dizzy. And I think she didn’t want Kelsey’s Wife yelling at her-they were sitting right next to each other.

      • Miss Anthrope says:

        That’s what I think too. She seems like one of those emotionally fragile people who doesn’t handle conflict well.

    • BessiB says:

      Probably since Kim worked more and Kyle supposedly had a more normal life, Kim had been “directed” though most of her formative years, so she cannot make a decision to safe her life. It would be natural for her to be lead around by someone, telling her what to do. And it is understandable that a normal person would be easily frustrated with dealing with an adult, especially with a sister, that did not develop ‘grown up’ skills.

    • TT in OC says:

      There may be sibling rivalry. However, if it is Kim being attacked and Kyle was the 3rd party witness, I am sure Kyle will still speak up for Kim. Besides, even if they are not sisters but just friends, I would still expect a friend to speak the truth. Kim doesn’t have to take sides, all she has to do is to tell what she saw objectively.

      • Even if she wasn’t a friend I would expect her to speak up!
        If I was being falsely accused of something and there was someone who knew the truth but refused to say anything I would be so mad regardless of who they were. And if that person were my sister – even worse!

  19. You Know Me says:

    Adrienne’s dress wasn’t hanging on the wall – It was IN THE WALL. Encased in the wall – like a real museum – a 3D dress on display!!!!!! in the foyer! LMAO Only really REALLY rich people think like that! Does she have boys? I don’t care how rich you are – if you have boys, it is a guarantee a boy, bat, shoe, book, fork – something will go thru that glass at some point! LMAO (*Adrienne, when you read this, can you please let us know when the glass has been broken and how)

    • I’m sure Adrienne only uses bullet proof and shatter proof glass. Like the kind the Pope rides around in.

      • Tralena says:

        That area the dress was in looked almost like a closet wing or something??

        • Yea it looked like the hallway between the closet and the bathroom. On the left side of the wall were glass shelves with purses and things. Like a store! Lol.

          • You Know Me says:

            Barbra Streisand put a lane of “shops” in her basement – true story – all set up like little boutiques to display all her crap, instead of just stacking in the basement like regular folks. I kid you not! #sawitonoprah

            Ok – just thought I should let you all know 🙂

            • Adgirl says:

              Wow, I never thought there was such a thing as having too much money (and I don’t begrudge anything rich people have earned) but a “lane of shops”, “a closet wing”?
              Didn’t Marie Antionette have a country village built for her at Versailles?
              I wonder what Camille has in her basement??

            • This reminds me of Elvis Presley. Or the way Elvis would live if he were still alive.
              Haute Redneck, but with MO’ MONEY.
              You can fancy it up, but it is still a Jungle Room.

      • Sardonica says:

        f.y.i. The pope is almost as important as a wedding dress. Bullet proof glass would be a smart move. No one likes a dead dress, or pope for that matter. Unless you are a Cardinal with high hopes but that is another story for another time 😉

    • Miss Anthrope says:

      I kind of thought it almost looked nice. It’s definitely not something I’d have in my house even if I could afford to do that, but it had a shred of charm to it. What bugged me was that the dress didn’t fit in it. The sides of the dress touched the sides of the wall. She should have had it built about 2 feet wider. I’m just neurotic about stuff like that I guess.

  20. Sardonica says:

    Yay!!! So happy my personal dealer is back. The withdrawal was awful but that is another story. Sorry I don’t have time to vent my thoughts and there are so many right now. Busy week with these damn thankful holidays and all. Yea, I am so thankful I have to cook food for umpteen ppl. ..yep yep… and thanks for the backache standing at the stove for 2 days slaving away for the ingrates enjoying themselves, bringing a hunk ‘o cheese or a bottle ‘o wine, etc. ( kidding, I love it! ) Hope to be back soon filing my report. You touched on most everything and caught something I missed, the kiss ( must have been swilling back a glass of wine or something? ) Dinner has been on hold since I saw this tweet and Mr S is patient and/or sick of hearing me moan about my blog being hijacked by some blog-pirates and my drug is not on the street and I have the shakes/sweats yada yada. Hope to contribute absolutely nothing to this blog tomorrow.
    p.s I loved Kyle’s sunglasses. Are they for sale on BHShadesRus? Need me some now

  21. Sardonica says:

    O! and that was her wedding dress. I went back, paused and studied. Great idea. Mine is in a box in the corner of the closet. Loved the entire dressing area of Adrienne’s house but was confused about the twirling watch thing . Made me dizzy. Maybe the kissing scene was after this which is why I can’t recall the kiss. Mr S just sighed and checked his blood glucose level. Dinner is served…outta here

  22. housewifeaddict says:

    I beg to differ – but I think the man in all the pictures with Camille should be referred to as Camille’s paid-actor pretend-lover. That isn’t sexual tension, it is Camille oozing with sex and Nick trying to act like he cares – because he is a paid-actor and they do that well. Wife Trish is likely watching from home and saying – “what a good actor my paid-actor pretend-husband Nick is as he acts in the RHWBH. You can barely notice how repulsed he is by Camille. Hopefully Kelsey will get him a job on another show and I won’t have to wipe Camille’s ooze off him every time he comes home. ”

    I think we all know that if the paid-actor pretend-lover was to deviate from his lines which are always – “so how did it go with the girls ….” as an opening to Camille telling the camera her version of events, and then him following up with half smile, head nodes, and a few uh -huhs – she’s have her husband Kelsey hire another paid actor to stage her scenes.

    Great blog as usual!

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  24. Amber...Real Wife says:

    Loved the recap RCH! You really hit Camille on the head with the hammer of truth. Kelsey must have had his girlfriend in the closet or was going to have a quickie before meeting with Cammie and the girls. As he guided her to the door i’m sure he wanted to yell GTF out bitch! But of course the cameras were present. Frasier has left the building indeed!

  25. jana says:

    Pretty good. I personally think Camille wants people to think she is having an affair. What two married people openly show this much chemistry infront of cameras? They’re definitely not cheating; they seem very open to me. LOL! Swingers maybe? Possibly, Camille, thought this was a great way of letting Nicks wife know. Who knows? Like you said “rich people are weird”
    LOL! Lots of rich people frame their wedding dress.

    About your blog… you are extremely relatable. Love that! I would suggest you stop using so many sentence extenders; they’re just not necessary. I get the feeling you’re very young, just by your writing style? But… you have great potential for becoming a top blogger on the web, not just on twitter. I’m serious. I’m not being sardonic. I feel I need to make that clear due to recent events. Thankfully we are allowed to make a lot of our own rules concerning punctuation; with that said, it’s easier to follow a persons story line if they use comma’s where there is a pause. No one is the perfect writer, no one! Even editors make mistakes. Not suggesting I am perfect. I would like to help you mature in your craft if you are interested. You’re relatable, creative and full of spunk. You simply bring something new and fun to your blog. I would like to see you blow up on the web. There really are a lot of pay blog sites. I feel you can blow up on your own. Otherwise, these sites email you a topic, you make a bid, write a blog on that topic; ( on your own blog page) you will already know how much the topic pays before you write the blog. You can also sign up to post an ad code on your blog sites, which promotes ads on your page, the more visitors, the more cash you make. Look into it! Work on your writing a bit first so you can go beyong loyal twitter friends. You can do it. 😉 I don’t think your blogger friends will ever tell you what you need to work on. That’s why I decided to. Good luck, love!

    • You are saying I use too many commas or not enough?
      I’m totally open to constructive criticism, I just didn’t understand what you were saying.
      I’m not a professional writer. This is just for fun, I’m not trying to turn it into a career.

      • housewifeaddict says:

        I agree that you’ve got a lot of talent. I’m not an editor – but I think your style is crisp, clean, readable, and above all – ridiculously funny.

      • justanothermary says:

        Don’t drink this koolaide RCH. If this person really could help you hone your craft she would know to use commas instead of comma’s. That’s a real rookie mistake. You’re great – just keep being you.

        • jana says:

          RHC
          I have no idea why your friends took offense to my trying to help you. I boasted on your creativity among other things. I wouldn’t offer advice to the hopeless. I never said your blog was terrible, nor do I think it is. I offered some simple tips as to improve your writing. You use a lot of ands and buts where they are not needed. For example: you could have said- “Kim is totally useless, she just sit there allowing the argument to continue” you could have said- “in Camille’s ear fueling” there was not need for the and. That’s all I’m saying.

          To the person that said “don’t drink that koolaid” I typed that comment as well as this one on my touch screen keyboard. Obviously my phone tries to spell for me. I had to edit 80% of that comment; I’m sure comma’s wasn’t the only mistake I missed. I also never said I was perfect. Now, since you can point out the most common of mistakes, tell me why you typed christ in the plural. It isn’t christ’s sake.
          I absolutely can help you make money with this blog. I am not going to post how here, but I can. I looked through all the RHW blogs, no one is using their blog to make cash. Why not? You have enough hits to bank some real cash. You’re writing the blog anyway so why not?

          Btw… ask yourself why your readers would take offense to you making some small, normal, improvements. Don’t change a thing? What? I never thought you should change your blog style.

          • I appreciate feedback actually. But you did come off a little harsh. I don’t know if people took offense exactly, but they were being defensive of me when it looked like I was being insulted. I think people are a little sensitive due to the recent real writer vs fake writer drama that has been going on. They were just standing up for me and I appreciate it. What can I say? They love me! Lol.
            But I never claimed to be a professional writer, or that I was trying to be (just pretending to be on AC). High school English class is the extent of my training… and I’m not even sure if that counts since I doodled on my notebook through most of it. Everything I know about commas and all that fun stuff comes from the books I read. And I think I tend to write the way I talk.
            I’m always up for improving myself so if you have some professional knowledge to share then please do! But please remember this isn’t a term paper, it’s just a fun blog that people enjoy and I think (most) people like it the way it is, even if I say “and” too many times.

            People have brought up the money issue before. I looked into it a little and it didn’t really seem worth it. Plus, honestly… I spend so much time on this blog do you know how money I would have to make for it to be considered profitable? A LOT. Personally, I think Bravo should be giving me a commission due to the amount of people who say they watch the shows just so they can appreciate my recaps. But that’s about as likely to happen as Kelly admitting she had a break down on Scary Island.

            Also, I try not to use the Lords name in vain (RCH is religious, who would have guessed?!) but when I do hear people say “for Christ’s sake” it’s usually with a “s” on the end. I guess some people just say it differently.

          • CAgirl says:

            Hi Jana,
            Another reason people may have been suspicious–I clicked your name which appears to be linked to a (non-existent) website, out of curiosity. It doesn’t go to an actual website, but the url said “tweakmynipple.com”. You can imagine that this appears to someone who is more of a prankster than a truly concerned fan. Just my take on it (and I don’t think I bothered to comment after I saw that).

            • Need a Hobby says:

              That & the previous posts at Lynn’s, the insulting, patronizing posts here. Now unctuously “concerned.” All this doesn’t quite create the impression of an uninvolved dispassionate observer. It also did not help that just like totally coincidentally, “blogging tips” subsequently were tweeted by another attitudinal self-styled expert. Who has indeed for realz “blown up real good” on the web. (h/t SCTV)

              So a “new” poster with no established cred starts off in such a manner and has “no idea” why anyone might have taken offense or found it all just a tad off-putting.

              That’s cute.

              “Listen to me kid and I’ll make you a star” is hardly a new rap. So concern troll, spammer, stalker, jester? Eh.

          • bluepickles says:

            Funny, you seem to have a superfluous comma in that last question. Absolutely no need to have one after the word “normal.” And not buying the whole “my phone autotyped comma’s.” It isn’t a common contraction or a popular possession word that would cause a phone to do that. Don’t come onto a blog and offer unsolicited “advice,” especially when your grammar could use some improvement.

          • Tuzentswurth says:

            Good grief, you are like KKB and Camille. Learn when too stfu and stop saying that out loud.
            1. “I offered some simple tips as to improve your writing.” AS is not only superflous in this sentence, but grammatically incorrect.
            2.”…tell me why you typed christ in the plural. It isn’t christ’s sake.” Christ is not typed in the plural, it is typed in the singular possessive. It is correct, you are wrong. You should also capitalize it because it is a proper name.
            3. I cannot emphasize this enough, STOP SAYING THAT OUT LOUD.
            4. All of the posters here have a vested interest in making sure that RCH never achieves any measure of success. We encourage her wild ravings and grammatical inconsistences because we want to keep her for our own amusement and we are afraid that if she becomes famous, she will turn her back on all of us and view us with scorn and disdain. We will be lower in the pecking order, she’ll be up there, we’ll be down here. You have truly exposed our insecurities and our reasons for pretending to love, cherish and fake support her. I hope you are happy now and that you go away. We ain’t buying it!

            • Tuzentswurth says:

              AND Jana, This is humor, farce, satire…look them up. The style is perfectly matched to the content. That is why it works so well and is so popular. You don’t really seem to get that, so just trust everybody else. These aren’t just “real” recaps to review the show for people. Now run along and review your writing handbook so if you come back to comment and critique, you won’t look so wholly incompetent.

            • Need a Hobby says:

              Tuz

              1. You left out the snotty Countess persona. That one chaps my ass. You know: when ol’ Lulu sobers up after a night on the town & then gets all high & mighty & lectures others for using the wrong fork…or other egregious breaches of etiquette like eavesdropping on others’ conversations & gossiping .

              And then a condom inconveniently pops out of her.

              And we all laugh.

              2. You were not supposed to tell about our plot to keep RCH poor and undiscovered, hidden deep within the pages of WordPress. Bad Tuz! Bad Tuz!

      • You Know Me says:

        PLEASE don’t change a thing! I love your writing style – its “you” and its syncopation is engaging. I wonder why some one would come on here, insult some one (I couldn’t tell if she was insulting you or another person who left a comment.) and then give you career advice! If I can’t even understand who the subject was of her mean post, I do not think she is some one to advise you on blogging!

      • Realminkey says:

        To quote an old Billy Joel song:
        I love you just the way you are. 🙂

        • justanothermary says:

          That song makes me crazy. He was married to Christi Brinkley for Christ’s sake, WTH is there to NOT love? Now, if he had married me . . . wellllll – that song would have been amazing!

          • Raquel Papel says:

            hi other Mary, I think he was married to his first wife when he wrote that song and not Christie. I love him and have been his fan for years, but he is not exactly a family man.

      • WindyCityWondering says:

        You get your point across both verbally and visually. Don’t change a thing cause you are bringing it the way we like it!

      • Daisy says:

        Don’t change a thing. The audacity of some people. It is much better to give constructive criticism when asked to, not unsolicited.

        I think Camille has found your blog.

    • Tuzentswurth says:

      “Pretty good”? The writing style matches the content, this isn’t a term paper.

    • Need a Hobby says:

      I’ve been trying to get RCH to write a memoir about her adventures as a long-haul trucker in the Great White North. Perhaps you could help her with that?

      Oh, and you might consider going easy on those semicolons, grasshopper.

      • Tuzentswurth says:

        ….and use complete sentences. Let’s all diagram this-“That’s why I decided to. “

      • Larue says:

        Is this the same Jana who said the commenters were making big asses of themselves? Jana, if there is nothing about this place you like there’s a really cool blog by a broad who goes by the name Jenn Sale. Google it.

      • Omg! How did you know! My new obsession is Ice Road Truckers and I really want to do it for one season. Just to say I did it! (and to write a memoir about it, obviously)
        I would probably be out learning how to drive a truck right now if it weren’t for this here Housewives addiction.

        • Need a Hobby says:

          LOL. After the UFC blog, I figured you had other, more robust interests than just silly pampered housewives on TV.

          Long-haul trucking came to mind. That’s why I laughed when the visitor offered mentoring advice to a young naive writer. Really, all that bloviating harshed my Zen. *cough*

        • TT in OC says:

          I was “forced” to watch it too since my hubby likes the show. They have a few of these truckers doing a show in India. It actually seems more dangerous to drive on any roads in India than on the ice.

          • I did see one episode of the India show. That one is way more dangerous. They have like at least one death every day I think. But that show didn’t interest me as much. I don’t know why, but there is just something about the ice roads that speaks to me. Lol.

    • jezzibel says:

      WOW…..I guess Mrs. Sale decided if you can’t beat them, then join and give as many backhanded insults as you can.

  26. Tuzentswurth says:

    RCH, your sentence extenders are some of the best and funniest tools you use in your satire. I’m not sure you should change anything, but I’m not an editor nor do I play one on TV. I agree with Jana that your potential is huge though. On to comment….
    DeDe-take your thumbs and leave, Cami can’t afford to pay you anymore. Maybe ask Kyle for a job being her friend b/c Kelsey will soon be selling some real estate and Mauricio stands to make sizable commissions.
    Bravo-“Kelly and Camille Go To Lunch” will be your highest rated show ever. Wonderful idea, RCH, get your payment for pitching this show.
    Where can I buy a copy of The Dictionary of Pretentious Bitches?
    Does anyone know why Adrienne would wear those shoes to walk 2 miles next door? Looked painful, I would have worn my flip-flops. Great blog, worth the wait and the horrid withdrawal symptoms, I think I got pernicious anemia.

  27. I’m bringing this over from the last blog.
    @thekidsisallright please read Jana at 9;18 am (on the teresa guidice blog)
    I think this is the post that got you annoyed. you confused Jana with juju.
    that’s why juju got her pants in a knot.
    you yelled at the wrong person.
    IMHO, you owe juju an apology.

    • housewifeaddict says:

      It’s possible it was related to 9:14.

      • i thank you for replying. even if i am wrong i appreciate the acknowlegdement.
        but RCH even replies to Jana in the negitive in regards to
        her 9:18 posting. (on that posting)
        !@housewifeaddict…i have always respected your postings.
        please, please double check your findings, thank you

        • housewifeaddict says:

          Hi Beverly, I agree that 9:18 could have caused the response – it just seemed to me that the other comment was also a little out of the norm. I hope they all make up, that the folks that are here just to stir up trouble take their ball and go home – and the blog returns to normal.

  28. ok. now that i got that outta the way, i can go read todays Blog.
    looks like a good one!

  29. ImaJillHater2 says:

    RCH, you really are the GOODS! (ie. one g-damned funny chick!)

    Your blogs always leave me convulsing in laughter such that I can barely catch my breath!

    Frankly, the Housewives shows really aren’t all that entertaining (except for “The ATL”), but I watch them so I can enjoy your blogs to their fullest!

    Thank you, thank you, THANK YOU for the Best Medicine (LAUGHTER)!

    Love, love, LOVE your blog!

    (BTW – I had to look up “pernicious” also. You’re right – it *IS* a word! Who knew?!)

  30. CAgirl says:

    Just venturing a guess here, but it’s probably about 30% more exhausting for Camille to keep up with her ever-changing reality than all the other ladies…

    Fantastic recap as usual–the only downside is that I will have to re-watch this silliness, dammit!! Oh, who am I kidding–you had me at the dictionary of pretentious bitches!!! Would be great if you continued with a word of the day/definition so we could all improve our minds a little–lord knows these shows have rotted my mind!

  31. ImaJillHater2 says:

    BTW, am I the only one who thinks that Taylor’s face & neck look like an upside down guitar?!?! (See 24th photo in blog sequence).

    And, yes, to whomever suggested it (sorry, I forgot) – Taylor DOES belong in a fish tank!

  32. Tuz. U broke my blog.
    Everything is slanty now.

  33. Tuzentswurth says:

    HOW IN THE NAME OF ALL THAT IS HOLY DID I ITALICIZE THE BLOG??????
    And how do I undo this unholiness? Omg, I’m gonna be shunned!

  34. Tam5115 says:

    OMG! Too damn funny.

    The Real Housewives Of Italics?

  35. Is it fixed?
    Tuz, u did the code for the italics the right way.
    I don’t know what happened, but it wasn’t your fault. It just went crazy.

    • CAgirl says:

      Was this some sort of insidious sneak attack that Kelsey’s wife learned from the Art of War??

      • housewifeaddict says:

        She was on page one! If you’re going to pretend to read a book, open it to the halfway point LOL

        • CAgirl says:

          Rookie mistake. She should go back and re-read the Art of Pretentious Whoredom. Page 1: when pretending to look smart by reading a high-fallutin’ book, choose one that no one has heard of and therefore cannot question you on the subject matter.

          • housewifeaddict says:

            I’ve heard of it – they quoted it in Survivor China a lot LOL. I get all my high end reading from reality shows.

            • Tam5115 says:

              Me too!

            • CAgirl says:

              Oh, that is too funny!! I had only heard of it from some of these NFL coaches using it to prepare their teams (hey, if it works for a football coach, must be good for shameless gold diggers, no?). So when my hubs tells me I’m rotting my brain with this stuff, I can just pull out all my new vocab (pernicious, travail, etc.) AND impress him with knowledge of reading material?! Can’t wait.

              • Tam5115 says:

                Survivor also taught me about John Nash’ non cooperative game play theory.

                I’s soo smart, ain’t I, Joe?

              • TT in OC says:

                It’s actually an ancient war strategy book written by General Sun. I read the Chinese version when I was in business school. It was recommended to use for business strategies and office politics.

                • I read it. It’s an interesting book, but I don’t think it’s a great idea to apply those strategies to personal relationships, which seems to be what Camille is trying to do.

                • TT in OC says:

                  Not if you want to make friend. It’s a book about strategies for warfares (i.e. ememies).

                • CAgirl says:

                  Somehow I think it would have been more believable (& applicable to her life) if she was filmed reading “Who Moved My Cheese” 😉

  36. Am I straight now?

    oh my almost a woo hoo?

    • that was weird, so happy to be straight, gonna get me some skinny girl!!

    • ilovelynn says:

      hi beverly, where are you? I’m right outside clinton nj in beautiful hunterdon county! I love nj! one hour out of nyc, one hour from the shore, one hour from the pa. mts. and lakes and 40 minutes to my 99 yr. old dad’s condo. in pa. they will be taking me out feet first from this property!(but hopefully, not anytime soon!!)

  37. Tam5115 says:

    Seems to be fixed now… or it’s backwards. whatever. hahahaha

  38. Tuzentswurth says:

    LOL! I restarted my computer, it seems to be fixed. I think we were in the Real Housewives of the Twilight Zone. That was weird, ( I secretly loved the feeling of sheer raw power I had over everyone’s computer, I felt like I was up here and you all were “down here” in the pecking order.) And remember, play nice or I will hijack you all again and make the vertigo return. (See how absolute power corrupts so quickly?)

  39. flippy says:

    That’s the funniest thing I’ve ever seen (italics) and I’ve read some funny shit on here over the last week. You folks rock!

  40. Tuzentswurth says:

    And now we’ve had the Great Italics Debacle of ’10. That was some funny shit!

  41. iwannabeanarchy says:

    I kept thinking that Camille was going to call Kyle a vermicious knid. I guess she must have stolen Frasier Crane’s proverbial word a day calendar. Stealing is so “Machiavellic”. God, I love this show.

    • Dalai Mama says:

      Vermicious Knids from Willy Wonka and the Great Glass Elevator in outer space?
      If so, I am worshipping at the altar of your reference!

  42. CAgirl says:

    Oh lordy, this woman has a jewelry line (one of the partners is her boyfriend’s wife).
    http://www.amorephosis.com/about-pid-11.html

    I think she may have written her own bio:
    “Camille is an actress, dancer and advocate who calls Beverly Hills (and on the weekend, Malibu) home. A working mom with two beautiful children, daughter Mason and son Jude, Camille is co-founder of Gramnet Inc., the production company which produces the hit shows Medium, Girlfriends, The Game, and I Love Sports. As an actress, she has appeared on both the big and flat screens.

    Confronted by her own need for radical transformation as a demanding new chapter in her life begins, Camille is dedicated to making a big difference through even the smallest of gestures.”

    Glad to know she has appeared on “the flat screen”. The fun never ends with her!!!

  43. Adgirl says:

    BTW ladies Machiavelli-ICK wrote The Art of War.

  44. Had Enough! says:

    I like Adrienne and her attitude and I sure wouldn’t mind having her $$$ BUT I bet she is jealous of ME because I can brush my hair, put on a pair of jeans, a t-shirt, and flip-flops and walk over to my neighbor’s house. It takes me 3 minutes max and I am so comfortable. Now maybe she was going somewhere after going to Lisa’s house and so did the get-up so she would be ready to go out, and I can understand that she did the make-up for the cameras. And I’m sure Stacey and Clinton would have a fit about the way I walked out the door, but IMHO, better to look normal and frumpy than awful and ridiculous, as did Adrienne on her hike across the street.

    If Adrienne just toned it down 10% (make-up and hair especially, but also clothes) she would look about a million percent better. Most of the time, Lisa gets it just right and so does Kyle, and they are undoubtedly more comfortable, too.

    • She should have just drove there. That was too far a way to walk in such high heels. Or she should have had a driver drive her over there! Haha. If I had her money I would do something like that just for the hell of it.

      • Need a Hobby says:

        Or at leave driven there in one of those newer electric golf cart like thingies. Environmentally conscious, yanno.

        I would have liked to seen her on a Segway, but arguably seeing her totter over to Lisa’s was just as ridiculous.

  45. Larue says:

    I thought one of Camilles worst moments was when she was doing her interview and said that she was the one who stayed calm and so she won the fight. I was just thinking WTH? I wonder what it is about Kyle that amplifies Camille’s crazy. People who make up shit like that are infuriating to deal with.

    Jana, sorry I ended my sentence with the word ‘with.’ You and your insults should check out Jenn Sale’s blog. You’ll have all sorts of things to criticize there.

    • WindyCityWondering says:

      Kyle is prettier, has a hotter husband and beautiful children and is the natural center of attention. Camille is insecure and jealous and wants to be the Queenbee of this group. So it is perfectly natural for Camille to go after the alpha female, except she truly isn’t qualified to be the Queenbee. She obviously didn’t really read the Art of War because she won’t win this one!

    • I was also thinking WTH? Personally, I think the one who is right wins the argument. But what do I know? My husband doesn’t have any emmys.

  46. jezzibel says:

    I believe there was speculation on Lynns blog that kelsey’s (soon to be ex)wife had made a pass at Kyle’s husband when they were in Vegas and he shut her down. That maybe why she is so hellbent on b**ching out his wife and going after his livelyhood, and that is a scenario I can totally see happening. Not to mention that Kelsey’s (soon to be ex) wife shut down her twitter acct due to all the backlash she’s been getting lately.

  47. Sardonica says:

    Okay, late on report. Dog ate it last night Just scooped it out of the back yard
    I am still in awe of the dress except it almost looks stuffed and mounted. Are there wedding gown taxidermists in BH? Dress looked as if it was once alive. Just wondering
    I am liking Russell more each week. I wonder why Bravo is trying to cast him in a negative light . I noticed how his daughter looked at him. Eyes of love. The editors can show what they want. The camera doesn’t lie. Wish it would when showing close ups on most of the BH faces. I think they spent too much time in the sun. Also notice every epi they remind us Lisa married young? No way is she 49. Why cant these women celebrate age. Oh the crazy is fun to watch, I forgot a sec. nevermind.
    This week I mentally moved out of Lisa’s house and into Adrienne’s. Loved loved loved the closet area. I wonder if it has it’s own zip code?
    Kim still makes me want to give her a hug a tell her everything will be alright. She was nervous when put on the spot and she seemd to freeze. It happens. At least she seems to be trying to particpate and interact more with the other women.
    Could they promo Kyle and Maurizio anymore. I don’t care for it when Bravo really shoves one person/s in particular at me. Makes me wonder why?
    Can we start a collection and buy Lisa’s dog Giggy some legs and/or feet. What is wrong with the dog? Always tired and limp. Not healthy? I do not care for animals as accesories so I should drop the subject now ( since I already put it out there ha ha. Think about it? Would you want to be carried around all day? Oh wait, yes, I would… n/m )
    I thought I wrote something about Taylor’s lips but I don’t see it. Crowded in the opium den today. Can you get some sort of annex thing going on,rch? hard to keep up with all the posts. Anyway I think they are def deflating as the season goes on. I paused DVR and looked. Next week I will start taking measurments and get back on this. Maybe chart the progress of the lips
    Nothing to typo about Camille. Cannot add anything to what she has already said and done. Lucky Kelsey getting off the hook scott free. Hope Bravo’s cut isn’t too big
    I am going to cont to champion Russell . I don’t think Bravo likes men who actually work sans family money and /or connections through wife? I still think it was fine he went to a job while in Vegas. Some people have to earn money by not whoring themselves out to a TV show. Bet he has more money he earned by his smarts and hard work than the others have on the franchise . That would piss Bravo off, yep.
    Sorry this post is too long but it has been along time since last recap. I actually only touched on a few points lol. I am liking BH franchie almost as much as NY. Mind you, almost

  48. Sardonica says:

    Please excuse all errors in my post. No typocheck today.

  49. housewifeaddict says:

    I just have to post this link. The contrast between Kelsey’s girlfriend and Camille is astonishing. The girlfriend looks so comfortable in her own skin. Scroll down to the bottom and there is a picture of Kelsey and Camille. Even at the informal picnic she is overdressed with high heels and cleavage popping. Kelsey looks the same – jeans and a t-shirt.

    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-1332365/Kelsey-Grammer-Kayte-Walsh-smiles-walk-New-York.html?ito=feeds-newsxml

  50. Meeshell says:

    Great recap! Cannot believe Camille actually said the statement about the pecking order in Beverly Hills. Who got cheated on and divorced from their husband? Who is still happily married with a super hot husband and a family dynasty. Hmmm – who’s on top of the pecking order now. Kharma can be such a bitch!

    Also, I just want to say that I have 3 sisters so I understand a lot more of the Kim and Kyle relationship. I think that Kim felt torn when she was put on the spot, and knew she would be attacked if she took a side, so she was just trying to say leave me out of this. Then, after Camille left the table, Kyle was still pissed, and lashed out at Kim (because it is easy to attack a sister, since you know they’ll forgive you in the morning). I don’t think she really meant to be that mean to Kim.

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