Taylor’s daughter is turning 4, so obviously it’s time for her to get her first piece of diamond jewelry. The diamond Barbie necklace is nice, but I’m pretty sure the kid would have rather had an actual Barbie doll. Or even $1,650 worth of Barbies!
Across the street at Adrienne’s its complete anarchy. She says that raising children is more difficult than running a multi million dollar company. I bet a lot of moms out there felt good about that comment. It scared the shit out of me.
Camille is stressing out over the enormous task of telling her house manager what to pack in her suitcase, and then waking up to catch the plane that will take her to her mansion in Hawaii. Oh, this poor woman. No wonder she has irritable bowls.
Back on planet earth Kyle is also planning her daughter’s birthday party. She will be serving french fries, mac and cheese, and no alcohol. Aww, I bet her kids are gonna be so upset they missed out on those tea sandwiches and Champaign!
I don’t know how she managed to keep Kelsey sober. Just the thought of having to live with this insufferable woman is driving me to crack open a bottle of Pinot right now.
Lisa is also celebrating her birthday. It is a freakishly normal and down to earth event considering what show she is on. I guess this is what happens when you have a lot of money and don’t have anything to prove.
Lisa and her husband go on a tour of the Music Institute with their son. The guide shows them the 24/7 all night music studios which are available to the sober kids who are just high on adrenaline till 5am.
Now onto the birthday parties:
Ok, now I have something to say about this….
I’m not knocking Taylor’s house. It isn’t small… and I’m sure it cost a lot of money considering it’s location. But if your house is 3 feet from your neighbor’s house with a one car garage and no front yard and you have $60k to blow, wouldn’t you use that money towards a mortgage on a bigger home rather than a party that lasts a couple of hours? This is the way I see it: If you don’t have a private jet or a second home, then you don’t have enough money to spend $60k on a birthday party. Just sayin….
Taylor shows Kennedy her party and the kid is less than impressed by the fancy table decorations. She just wants to play on the swing. I think we all learned from Milania in Italy that kids don’t like “eat parties”.
This is the birthday girl’s table. $60k and the kids are sitting on plastic chairs. And they couldn’t even be bothered to stick a bow on every chair. Really Taylor?
Update: I have just been informed that there are green bows on every other chair. But I can’t see them! Do you see green bows in this picture?? (Still doesn’t change the fact that she spent $60k and got plastic chairs from Walmart)
Taylor makes a toast to… herself! Of course. She is the one who had to suffer through 9 months of pregnancy and then push the kid out, so really, she is the one everybody should be celebrating, not the kid who -let’s face it- really didn’t do anything.
Back at Taylor’s celebration of excess they drag the kids out of the dirt long enough to give Kennedy her cake and make her listen to some crappy song written for her while she covered her ears and cried. I wonder if she will be forced to listen to that song at every party, or if she will get a new one each year?
Russel got his daughter a dog, she was finally happy, and he actually seemed normal and not so awful in this episode. Taylor was pissed that he took attention away from her diamond Barbie necklace gift that she was trying to impress
all her friends Kennedy with.
Next week Camille is still insane and Kyle calls her on it. Can’t wait!