Danielle isn’t holding back anymore! She gave her first post reunion interview to Steppin Out magazine and has finally shed that love&light bullshit and is saying the kind of stuff we all want and expect her to say. Danielle’s Bravo Blogs of the past few weeks have been boring and pointless as she stopped the insults and spent the entire blog thanking random people and rarely addressing anything that actually happened on the show. I thought she had gone soft on us. But looking back, I think she probably found out that she was being let go from the show around the time her blogs started sucking and decided to save all the good stuff for a publication that was willing to pay for it.
Most of her verbal knock outs went to Teresa, here are the highlights:
“She needs a hairline revision,”
“Planet of the Apeshas nothing on her!”
“Could you imagine if her face is that hairy what her body hair must be like? It’s got to be out of control.”
“If she was making Joe happy maybe he wouldn’t have to go some place else. I don’t know what goes on in their bedroom, but from what I’ve seen, Teresa is not exactly a turn on. Her forehead is disturbing. But it’s not even about her looks.”
“Her personality and lack of compassion is what makes her ugly. It’s the way she speaks to her husband and overindulges her children is what makes her ugly. She’s teaching her children to be just like she is. Look at her kids. They’re gorgeous little girls, but their attitudes only show disrespect. I don’t care of that. I feel bad for them. They’re learning what they live.”
“The mother is teaching them they are too good for everything except being treated like princesses. But it’s not reality. Teresa, you’re 11 million dollars in debt. How much of a princess can your kids be? Make them work. Give them structure. Her children want to be told what’s wrong and what’s right. They need boundaries and structure. That’s what I do for my kids. I give them structure and boundaries.”
“I said this from the beginning: In time everyone will be exposed. I don’t have to say anything. They’re exposing themselves. Dina is a liar. She lies and all the others swear to it. It’s almost as believable as Teresa’s husband Joe getting drunk after he had his car accident because he needed to calm his nerves. I’m very passionate about not letting him get away with that. I don’t think drunk driving is anything to be made light of. Bravo glorified it and that makes me sick.”
“When Andy Cohn brought that up at the reunion and after Teresa told that crazy story he said, “Oh I can believe that.” Um… really? He smashed his car and Teresa claims ten of them shared just one bottle of wine. Meanwhile have you ever seen them without a glass of wine in their hands? But this one time they split one bottle of wine and Joe got drunk after he smashed into a telephone pole. Really?”
“I’m not allowing Joe to get away with it. My daughter is getting her drivers license and I’m not going to let people like Bravo, Joe, and Teresa get her killed because they think it’s funny to drive drunk. That’s not going to happen. Joe is a liar and shame on Bravo for supporting him. Joe was drunk when he hit that telephone pole… Every single scene those women are in they’re drinking alcohol. Do you see me drinking? No. Because I have to drive. And I have a much better time when I’m sober.”
Danielle is still dancing around questions regarding her relationship with Lori Micheals. She is refusing to call herself a lesbian or a bisexual, claiming that she doesn’t like labels. Whatever. I honestly could care less who she dates, unless they’re famous (Lori doesn’t count – I’ve never heard of her) or related to Teresa. But if you still had a doubt in your mind as to whether or not Danielle and Lori were more than friends, take a look at these two quotes:
From Steppin Out: “I’ve had six relationships with women and I will tell you women kiss better than men”
She told OK!: “If I am dating [Lori], this would be the sixth [girlfriend].”
So if she’s had sixth female relationships total, and Lori would be her sixth girlfriend if they were in a relationship… then if my math is correct that would mean that Lori is Danielle’s girlfriend. I solved the mystery. You’re welcome. Now you can all sleep soundly tonight.
Danielle told US “I made [RHONJ] successful.” I think this is true. What would the other women have done without her? Stood in their proverbial kitchens and talked about the weather? Went to a fashion show, saw fashions, and left peacefully? Had clown sit downs in empty restaurants by themselves?
Danielle is still claiming that she quit the show to explore other options. All rumors say she was fired, although I’m still not yet convinced on any of the explanations I’ve heard for why she was fired.
PopEater is reporting that a “Housewife insider” told them that Caroline and Jacqueline (no mention of Teresa) banded together and threatened to leave if they didn’t fire Danielle. According to this “insider” after losing Dina Bravo didn’t want to risk losing two more cast mates. I don’t know how believable this is. The show didn’t suffer at all from the loss of Dina, in fact it broke ratings records in her absence, and Caroline and Jacqueline really served no purpose this season other than to attend Teresa’s parties and vacations and talk about Danielle. Danielle and Teresa are the ones who bring the ratings, and the only reason Teresa does things that bring ratings is because Danielle is there. I just feel like there has to be more to the story.
Another reason I don’t find Popeater to be very reliable is this quote:
Bethenny [Frankel] left the New York cast and the ratings stayed the same,” a TV executive confirms. “Several cast members have left other ‘Housewives’ shows and no one cared. The only ‘Housewives’ that Bravo needs to hang onto are the Manzo family. They are TV gold and Bravo knows it.”
Considering the small fact that The Real Housewives of New York hasn’t yet aired without Bethenny Frankel, I would say Popeater’s “TV executive” is full of crap – if he even exists.
UPDATE: Zen Jen on why Danielle was fired: “It mostly had to do with the underhanded production deals going on with Danielle like the Hustler brokered sex tape she claims to have made not a single dime off of. Uh-huh….sure. Basically her side projects were not Houswives brand approved.”
I know everyone wants to hear about our new favorite Housewife and I didn’t forget about her. Apparently Danielle and Melissa are friends who bonded over their mutual hatred of Teresa. And Danielle was the one who introduced her to the Bravo producers! We’ve all been wondering what on earth Danielle ever did to Teresa that was so horrible. How much do you want to bet this is it? Another quote from the Steppin Out article:
“The reason Melissa initially contacted me was to tell me she felt so horrible watching somebody else be treated as badly as she was treated by Teresa for over a decade. She said that when Teresa is jealous and threatened by another woman that’s how she behaves.”
Danielle also did an interview with Out.com. Here are the highlights:
But did you try to get Dina’s kids taken away from her?
No, I don’t even know her daughter’s last name. I do know that Dina did a whole article devoted to trying to make the world believe that I did that, but Dina’s not doing the show because she forged a legal document with her ex-husband’s name on it, giving her daughter permission to do season 1. And when her ex-husband found out about it, he forbade her to do season 2, leaving Dina with nobody in her immediate family — her daughter or her husband, who never taped with her once — to do anything with her. So she left the show because she was too embarrassed to say that she forged a legal document. I had to have my ex-husband sign for my children. She didn’t do that. But again, Dina lies, and everybody swears by it. Dina is more fake than the whole lot of them. It’s just that she’s the baby of the family, so Caroline’s going to keep backing her up.
At the reunion when Teresa came at you, it didn’t seem like there were bodyguards ready. They were letting her —
Yeah, they did. And that was when, after I left, I came back, and I told them, “She moves her ass off that couch — I want to know that you guys are doing something about it.” It was after that that you see the bodyguards restraining her. Because they were told — and that’s what they told me — they were told, “It’s OK. Just let it happen. We’ll let you know.” But when I threatened to just walk, that’s when they said, “OK, we’d better protect her.” In other words, I was treated like a piece of shit. Nobody would treat any of them that way because they have husbands or because they have a big family that would be right up in arms. But what about me?
What do you make of Andy Cohen on the reunion and Watch What Happens Live? He’s positioned as the moderator, but it doesn’t really seem like he’s on your side.
Yeah, I do feel slighted by Andy — I’ll be honest with you — and he’s someone that knows how strong my ties are to the gay community. Not only that, how he’s the executive vice president of Bravo. I would think he would want to treat us all at least equally. I, in no way, shape, or form, feel like I was treated as an equal. I’m not asking for favoritism, but I would have expected more from him. I truly would have. And I know he’s my boss and all that, but… I’m just going to speak the truth like I always do. I’m very disappointed, and I think he’s getting lashed out at by many, many fans — gay and straight. From what I’m hearing and what I’m reading, people are very unhappy that he did not, like, throw Teresa out for her behavior. I mean, she physically picked him up and threw him. And then he sat her down like a five-year-old and said, “Don’t get off the couch again, OK, little girl?” Instead of just like, “Get the f out of here. You can’t touch me like that.”
Why did what you said about her nephew make Teresa so mad in the first place?
Well, if you notice, the only two times I saw her this season, she physically came after me. What did I speak the first time? Her house was in foreclosure. Is it in foreclosure?
It appears so…
See, if I say something that’s true, they’re going to go off. Yet they’re allowed to sit and say two seasons full of lies about me. And then make up things to make it seem like I did things even worse than what I did when I was 20 years old. But yet I sit there and speak the truth, and they dive on top of me.
So what were you saying?
Teresa never greeted her nephew. I have proof of that in email. She never said congratulations to her brother when her nephew was born. Her brother has been directly contacting me for the past year and a half, letting me know how he feels about his sister. And how he and his wife — pregnant wife — were thrown from her house because they brought my favorite cookies to Christmas Eve.
Your favorite cookies?
My favorite cookies. From Corrado’s! The ones I took on The Today Show in season 1 [of The Real Housewives of New Jersey].
Teresa threw a hissy fit. And not once do you see her with her brother and her sister-in-law and their beautiful children. Not once! But she glorifies everybody else. Why couldn’t she show her real family? Why? Just tell me why? Because they have more than her maybe? Because she’s jealous of them maybe? Or maybe they would have told the truth and said Teresa goes off like that all the time. “It’s not just Danielle. Teresa’s certifiably crazy.” I think they’re going to have their chance now to speak the truth. Go for it, I’m all behind you.
If any of you still had your doubts, it sounds to me like Danielle also thinks Melissa is going to be a part of the show next season. But I have to say I think Danielle is exaggerating the cookie incident. You can read Melissa’s version of cookie-gate here. She doesn’t say anything about being thrown from the house, just that the cookies were thrown in the trash. Either way, I’m happy to have our old shit talking Danielle back. Even if she embellishes her stories, it’s still fun to listen to her go off.
How much do you love, love, love the new direction The Real Housewives of New Jersey is taking?
Check back later to read Caroline’s bullshit Bravo blog.