BS Bravo Blogs: Cat, Lynda, Mary and Michaele

DC’s blogs are just as full of crap as the rest of them. My comments are in bold.


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Try Being Honest

Cat talks vinyard security detail, Lynda’s adorable family moments, and her “rude London brashness.”

Well, sometimes you have to see it to believe it … and that was the case with the “vineyard grape stomp,” with full on security detail protection! (I saw two guys in suits) From who? His mother??? (Even old women can holler and scream and disrupt a situation) Call me old-fashioned, but as a mother myself I can’t even fathom what it would be like having a son who finds it necessary to take those precautions for his guests. (I can’t fathom what it would be like to have a mother you need to take those precautions against) Got to wonder what the story is there (It’s been in the news for a long time now. Try a google search) – poor lady. Let’s get real. I needed to the extent of their BS for myself. (Are you missing a word in that sentence?) I knew there were no grapes and the sad thing is if they had been honest about the state of the business, (I remember them saying the winery had been closed because of a law suit and this was the first time they were having people there in a while) then we could have made a difference and brought positivity and helped with a plan for the future, rather than absolute crap. (I don’t think they needed her “help with a plan for the future”, I think they were just looking to have some fun and get some free advertising for their business) I couldn’t hold back my astonishment over the depth of their deception.(Grape Gate – Oh the deception!) “Let’s all love each other shall we?” Give me a break! Try being honest first.

On a happy ‘real’ note, loved seeing lovely Lynda’s kids in toddlers PJ’s, it was sooo sweet and adorable. (Adorable? Really?)Great kids, awesome mother. You reap what you sow in life.

I felt Mary’s house didn’t show her warmth, which is why I was shocked with her plans to have black walls. The more comfortable your guests are in their seats, the better the evening. I love Deborah’s shop but my bottom is way too boney to sit on some of those chairs! Shoot me again for saying it like it is. When I see how outspoken I can be, I wish I could redo all the filming! That “rude London brashness” … when do you see the other side of me? Please hurry up and bring it on! All my friends here in the UK are shaking their heads big time! (Because you are reinforcing negative stereotypes making them all look bad) They know me and love me and are looking forward to seeing more of ‘me’! (It’s the editing!)

Maybe next week when I’m dressed up as Sarah Palin (keeping it real of course.) Thanks to those who are enjoying a breath of honest air and who support me while I fail to understand the superficial, unnatural, bewildering existence of some of my cast members.

(Cat didn’t say much, and I don’t have much to say in return.)

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Jason & Ted’s Excellent Adventure

Lynda talks holidays with the family, date night, and Jason’s recap of the Congressional Black Caucus dinner.

I want to thank you all for continuing to support me and the Real Housewives of DC. I appreciate you taking the time to share your comments with me. (If she were truly thankful for the support she wouldn’t be suing bloggers)

Tweet, tweet!
My Twitter impostor’s wings have been clipped! I am just grateful that no harm was done and no feelings were hurt.(actually the impostor helped her reputation – I am fully expecting her to ruin it now) But it’s time for you to hear it straight from this bird’s mouth. You can follow me on Twitter at THERealLyndaDC (not an active twitter account). I have spoken with you about my challenges with technology. (So maybe she won’t figure out how to work the “block” button… if she every figures out how to create an account) I think it stems from being dyslexic, but I can’t blame it all on that. It has to do with my age and enablers (I think it has to do with the fact that she was born before the telephone was invented). I have a fabulous team who work with me to keep my hectic life in order. (a.k.a her son’s girlfriend who can’t even keep her own hair in order)

Salute!
I’d like to thank ya’ll for the lovely recommendations of wineries to visit in Virginia. Although “Viewer VA’s” comment made me LOL, I really do want to find local wines to enjoy with family and friends. I’m all for supporting local businesses and the environmental benefits buying local has on our earth. We have between now and October to plan our Virginia wine tour so keep those suggestions coming. (The Salahi’s organize a tour of the vineyards in Virgina wine country. That’s what their “awful white limos” are used for. This whole paragraph is a dig at the Salahi’s)

Family Values
As you can see my kids have a great sense of humor (I did not see that). They ordered each other “onesies” for the holidays and have been sporting them around the house every chance they get (I unfortunately did see that). It cracks me up (It freaks me out) to see grown kids parading around in a onesie. 😀 (INSERT BIG SMILE ICON) Nothing gives me greater pleasure than to cook for my family when time allows. Our family meals give us the opportunity to catch up on what is taking place in our lives. It’s rare that I can get them all together at one time, but I’ll take what I can get, and I love every moment of it.

Date Night with Ebong at Mie N Yu
Boot Camp 101, a.k.a. date night, is the key to a successful relationship, especially when you are surrounded by friends and family as often as we are. I think most of you can relate to this. Over the years I’ve come to realize that it’s much better to designate a weekly date night vs. couples therapy down the road.

The night we were filmed, we went to one of my favorite Georgetown restaurants, Mie N Yu, on M Street. I love Chef Miller’s fusion of cuisines from cultures along the ancient Silk Road. (<— Her ticket to free meals. Right out of the Jill Zarin handbook.)

Jason & Ted’s Excellent Adventure…
Ted Gibson’s Salon was a much needed addition to the Chevy Chase Collections, better known as Rodeo Drive East, where top designer stores and fabulous restaurants line the streets. It’s been such a pleasure getting to know Ted and Jason. They’ve been extremely generous and have opened their hearts as well as their beautiful new salon to the housewives. (Translation: the ladies get their hair done for free in exchange for the free advertising.)

… Not!
In this week’s episode you see Jason and Ted’s adventures in DC unfold. Like in the movie Bill and Ted’s Excellent Adventure where they travel back in time, I bet Jason and Ted wish they could go back in time and change what transpired the night of the Congressional Black Caucus dinner.(You are not funny Lynda, stop trying, it’s sad.) It just so happened, Mary, our friend Aleta, and I were having dinner at the J & B Steakhouse in the W Hotel when Mary started receiving crazy text messages from Jason about what was taking place. OMG! We suggested that they join us right away as we were all anxious to hear about their evening. From the moment they arrived, I could not believe what I was hearing. Talk about a goat rodeo! (So the entire scene at the furniture store with Jason telling Mary about what happened that night was fake and staged? Thanks Lynda, for revealing Mary to be even more fake than I previously thought she was.)

I so appreciate Jason’s honesty and willingness to share (or take advantage of the opportunity to cause drama and get on tv) what was obviously an embarrassing and bewildering evening for both himself and Ted. Who on earth would invite guests to attend a high security and high profile event without having tickets?! But why am I surprised? I guess I just can’t get used to the idea that some people have that much chutzpah! (Chutzpah? She really is sounding more and more like JZ, huh?)

On a Positive Note
I leave you with a poem from the Golden Book of Reconstruction Letters
Builders for Eternity
“Isn’t it strange that princes and kings,
And clowns that caper in sawdust rings,
And common folk like you and me,
Are builders for eternity?
To each is given a bag of tools,
A shapeless mass, and a book of rules;
And each must make, ere life is flown,
A stumbling block or a stepping stone.”
–Author Unknown
(Ugh… shut up you pretentious old grandma.)

Peace & Blessings, (DC version of Love&Light? Like I said in my blog – recycled.)

Lynda

(Dear Lynda – I ran this by my lawyer. In case you were wondering, I am allowed to do what I just did with your blog, so don’t waste your time trying to sue. My blog (and others like it) are providing free advertising for Bravo.com, the Bravo TV network,  and for The Real Housewives franchise. If you would like to sue me anyway just for the hell of it, please send me an email at realcityhousewife@yahoo.com and I would be more than happy to provide you with my lawyers contact information.)


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I Laughed, I Cried, I Cringed

Mary talks about her honest (and sometimes unpopular) opinions, DC’s diversity, and catty gossip.

What a roller coaster ride watching this week’s episode was for me! I laughed, I cried, I CRINGED! How about you? (I mostly just yawned)

I am really intrigued by Stacie’s story and how it is unfolding. I know it has been a work in progress for her over the last few years. I have deep empathy for her quest to find her birth mother and father. Until I heard Stacie’s story that was something I definitely took for granted, it made me appreciate the gift God has given me with my own parents. I also loved seeing Stacie with her “real world” girlfriends from Howard University. I may have been born and raised in Virginia, but even I know what a huge event the Howard Homecoming is to its Alumni! It was nice to see how supportive and encouraging they are of Stacie.

I had mixed emotions watching the scene at Contemporaria in Georgetown. It’s one of my favorite places and happens to be owned by Deborah Kalkstein, an incredibly talented Peruvian born classically trained architect and interior designer who is one of my dearest friends. (<— 40% discount for that sentence) I was slightly mortified when I threw out an idea about black walls and Cat and Jason had some rather caustic words of opinion. I was actually proud of myself by expressing to them the need to show respect and also loved watching myself continue to laugh and have fun with them dealing with issue and moving on. A true friend will speak the truth, express honest feelings and deal with issues with no hard feelings. The three of us have that deep of a relationship and mutual respect that we can keep it REAL and honest. Believe me, I have been on the other end when I have done something unintentionally offensive to Cat and she was honest and truthful about how I had made her feel. I so appreciate her openness, honesty, integrity as a treasured true friend. (No mention of the fake conversation with Jason B that day?)

DC is NOT “Hollywood for Ugly People!” I get offended by that statement! We have highly intelligent and motivated achievers here (with great personalities? Lol)! The DC Area’s diversity isn’t shown as much as I would like so far in the series. I have been fortunate enough to get to see a lot of different sides to our city and the people who live here- I enjoy all of them. Congressmen, Senators, Lobbyists, Generals, White House employees, (you know – all kinds of diverse people) etc. They aren’t just Republicans and Democrats to me, they are neighbors and parents with kids who I went to school and church with. (She wants to make it very clear that she is friends with politicians) From National to local level politics,from charitable events to local PTA’s, DC is about people to me, not about what policies they are promoting or fighting. (Mary doesn’t care what people believe in as long as they are powerful and important and willing to be her friend) I love interacting with people with diverse opinions and attitudes on a real and human level. Thankfully there is no shortage of that here in DC! I only hope our leaders across the Potomac can adapt a less partisan way of operating and affect positive change for our great nation!
Off that soapbox and onto the Oasis Winery Grape Stomp! It is a spectacular piece of land and you can tell it was designed for entertaining. The “Thompson Seedless grape stomp”(get your digs in) was actually fun! I was glad, (and a bit jealous in retrospect) when Cat and Jason B left, as I was relaxed and doing what I love to do, being present and making the best of a beautiful day, no matter who, where and what is the situation. Believe me, I did my best! The end of the evening was tortuous to say the least, and difficult to navigate around Michaele’s defensive and distasteful comments (Maybe the distasteful comments will be in the next episode?) throughout the evening. The truth is, Michaele has known Lynda for years, has been a guest at her home, and at one point had a professional relationship with her as well. (And that is supposed to excuse Lynda’s nasty behavior?)

I do want to also clarify that I in no way intend to be judgmental about anyone when it comes to their choice of career. EVER. I honor and respect all people who work hard at any profession. (Sorry, but I don’t buy the “honor and respect” crap from the woman who’s opening line is “I don’t make money!”) Unfortunately, I appear to be a bit catty (she didn’t “appear” catty, she was being catty) when sharing with Cat in the car ride out to for our polo lesson that Michaele sold me cosmetics at Nordstrom (dig) in the 90’s. For this I humbly apologize for appearing (she means “being”) judgmental. It was merely me stating the facts (lie)about how I know Michaele. I have fond memories of Michaele from back them, she was incredibly talented as a makeup artist and remember her fondly being the bubbly, happy and gorgeous tall blonde as you entered the store from the Mall entrance! (Dig)

(See, this is why I don’t like Mary. Apparently Mary is another one of those stupid women who believe the viewers are as stupid as she is and that no one will pick up on this obvious bullshit. I have a feeling that DC may have a slightly different audience than NJ, and I don’t think Mary is going to get away with this attitude as easily as Teresa does. At least I hope she doesn’t.)

Virginia horse and wine country really is spectacular in the fall, (if you ever have a chance to visit, make it happen!) The drive out reminded me of visiting my Grandfather in that area as a child, the rolling hills always made me think there was an ocean on the other side of them and I love how quickly you can be from DC to the country. It’s pretty unique and I have always enjoyed taking the kids to pumpkin patches, mazes, farms and cider stands. Seeing it makes me excited for sweaters, boots and jeans and crisp Fall mornings in DC!(Bla bla bla… get to the point)The ride down gave us a chance (for the 3rd time apparently) to hear about the Black Caucus dinner incident involving the Salahis with Jason and Ted in tow. I wasn’t quite sure what to make of it! All I know is that Jason B was blowing up my phone with text messages at the event in complete shock and disbelief at what he was witnessing. I would never crash a party, (clearly she doesn’t have the balls) much less something the President was scheduled to attend. I couldn’t imagine many people who would, so perhaps there was a credible explanation coming up…. It was obvious the Turners couldn’t make heads or tails of anything either- I think it was definitely curiosity that led all of us down there. I loved Jason T’s line about it being “tantamount to Stacie crashing a Daughters of the American Revolution” party! Too funny! (Funny is not the word I would have used to describe that statement.)

I will choose not to address the very upsetting and absolutely made up and false accusations of the Salahi’s about my daughter (side note: more details on this in Michaele’s blog) and will take the high road here on this, knowing the truth as I do.(If she knows the truth, then why is she “taking the high road” instead of clearing her daughters name?)My daughter, Lolly is the furthest thing from a criminal and while I certainly don’t consider myself or my children perfect, I was outraged at their ludicrous and shocking allegation, but enough of that for now.The fact that I have made a very personal decision to create a barrier for my daughters and my closet (yes, closet security is a very personal decision) is not due to any mistrust in them in any way shape or form. (Of course not, pentagon level fingerprint security locks were created for people who trust the people in their life) Simply, its a matter of convenience (having to scan your finger every time you walk into your closet sounds very convenient) to keep track of my belongings and allow my girls to borrow anything their hearts desire, teaching them the principle of respecting others and asking appropriately. I love my girls to look great (then she shouldn’t let them borrow her clothes) and they know very well they are welcome to anything and everything, just on my terms of “asking first!” (and if she trusted them like she claims, then she could trust that they would ask before taking something and not need to lock the closet door) I love to share what I have been fortunate enough to afford, especially when it comes to looking great and being stylish, particularly when it comes to my gorgeous girls! (<— sound familiar?)

The Ted Gibson scene made me smile. I can’t help myself, I LOVE Ted Gibson.(And free hair appointments!) Ted and his husband/business partner Jason are just like any old married couple that likes to laugh, and poke fun at each other. I know the deep love and commitment that they share for each other and spending time with them makes my day! I didn’t like how I seem to suggest that I was introducing them to “all the important people in DC”, (that damn editing again) as that job is well above my pay grade and social connections (pretending to be humble must be another one of those “DC things” like not being flashy or showing your money), I just wanted to introduce him to people who could benefit from his incredible talent of making a woman of any age feel beautiful. I’m excited that you will see more of Ted and Jason and their talents as the season progresses. They were so generous with their time and resources in showing support for my charity Labels for Love as we hosted the Modus Union event. Check out our website www.labelsforlove.org for our next event coming on November 4th!

Thank you all for your support and kind words over the last weeks! This was an enormous risk to throw myself and my family out into this “reality” world. As a family, we jumped into this for all positive reasons, mainly to promote our charity work with an opportunity to help others on a larger scale with exposure as well as sharing our story of being a family. I am very proud of my family and its refreshing to hear about how many of you relate to us as a family. Keep up the positive feedback, we are all loving it!

Thank you for hanging in there with us! As I believe with all my heart, the truth WILL prevail! (And the truth has been prevailing in every episode that shows her to be a two faced gossip)

blogger imageTIs Better to Give Love Than to Receive Meanness (at least she’s not saying “wear”… but still a little too close to crazy for my comfort)

Michaele on negative energy and the importance of rising above.

In Episode 4, I was excited to be part of the opening of a new salon in Maryland for Ted Gibson. I was approached by Ted Gibson Salon to sponsor this grand opening of his new salon. Our winery gets asked very often to donate wine to various charity events, in order for venues to not incur costs. Our winery was proud to be supportive to Mr. Gibson. We were happy to invite our friends and clients to support his new salon as well. Ted and I had worked together on a fashion show prior to this and had fun, so I thought it would be nice to support him.

Lynda Erkiletian came up to me and pinched my fanny (“fanny”? really?) at Ted’s opening, and I was nice, as I am to everyone. This was the first time I had seen Lynda in a while. You see in this episode Lynda say “I love you” to me, and I say it back — I think that was her way of saying I am sorry is all I can guess. I decided to be gracious, move forward, and still invite her out to the vineyard for the “I Love Lucy” grape stomp!

On the ride to the winery we heard Mary obsess about me. Mary tells us she doesn’t have any bad words about me, nor does she judge anyone. We hear this in her own words in the show. Yet we hear Mary contradict herself in this episode and talk of me as a “social climber” using wine to build my social status.

Be real and honest is all I ask from anyone. Don’t act one way to my face and another behind my back. If you don’t like someone, be real. To judge someone because they worked as a make up artist is really sad. I was very good at helping women with style back then, including Mary Amons, and would do it all over again. Jason Turner’s reaction to Mary in the limo on her comment about me is priceless on this! He made me smile and laugh. Such a great spirit to him. Fun! Thank you Jason! (So far I agree with everything she’s saying. But does anyone else thinks she writes as though English is her second language?)

Here is a “shout out” to all the hard working girls out there – no matter what your career, be proud. Don’t let anyone judge you or make fun of who you are or where you are from or what your career is! Love to you!

Jason Backe and Ted Gibson told me at Mary’s Birthday party that they really wanted to come to the Congressional Black Caucus fundraiser that would be attended by President Obama and First Lady Michelle Obama. They asked if I could help them attend because it was their dream to see the President of the United States in person. I phoned our entertainment attorney, Paul Gardner, who had invited us. Our attorney stated to me that he was able to also get them tickets to attend as his guests. The night was fun with a little drama… more to tell on this soon!

It has become obvious that Jason Backe enjoys acting (I believe this). His story of the events at the Park party last episode, and now during the evening of the Congressional Black Caucus contained major inaccuracies (I believe this too), even though it was somewhat entertaining to listen to. Bottom line: at no time did the “Secret Service” escort us out of the Congressional Black Caucus! Just breakin’ it REAL. (<–Huh???  I feel like we may be seeing signs that Michaele is “not all there”)

At the winery we had a blast! It was so fun having the Turners & Mary out to the winery during an amazing fall afternoon in the heart of Virginia Wine Country. Everyone remembers that classic moment in “I Love Lucy” when Lucy started grape stomping with her bare feet. We do these wine tours and grape stomps for a lot of our customers and private corporate groups. So I arranged this great afternoon/evening with them to stomp grapes and eat dinner downstairs in the winery. It was a blast!

Unfortunately, Cat didn’t want to come out and play! But she loved blowing the whistle! My friend/assistant Jennifer couldn’t tolerate any more of Cat’s rudeness that day and mimicking me. When I said “Give Love” to help Cat be nice and try to help change her mood to an upbeat style, Cat made fun of me. Jen had enough — Jen is very real and doesn’t tolerate any mean spirit or negative energy. Love her.

During our wine tasting dinner in the barrel room of the winey, Mary kept asking Tareq what he had to say. She kept pushing to find out. Tareq was staying quiet and finally tells her. Information that we had unfortunately discovered by the authorities was on his mind. Let me first refresh your memory: when Mary tells us all, her daughter has problems with taking things without permission. Hence the fingerprint-coded door lock on Mary’s closet to keep her daughter out. We learned that Mary’s daughter, Lolly, was aware from Facebook of items stolen from my husband and his team, that included an automobile, and thousands of dollars of polo gear equipment. The authorities had in fact issued arrest warrants for one of Lolly’s Facebook friends. Since it was a part of what was happening right then in our life, we decided to share it and thought it would be better that we inform Mary ourselves (on national television), instead of Mary hearing from the authorities. More to come on this … all Tareq asks for is an apology.

Tareq, Mary and Jason really enjoyed the wines and were feeling great! I was the only sober one at the end of the night, but had just as much fun! If you are interested in learning more about Oasis Winery and our wines, check out www.oasiswine.com. We plan to reopen the winery, depending on the outcome of a trial in Fauquier County, Virginia that is scheduled to begin on September 20th.

My natural instinct is to always trust and love everyone… however I again learned that it’s important to be careful who you trust.

“Give Love”!

Love & Cheers! (<– Cheers? See this is what I’m talking about… She has this “Kelly-ish” thing where she uses words that don’t fit right with what she’s trying to say… Just sayin.)
Michaele
OXOOXOXOXO

(I really don’t have many negative comments for Michaele’s blog. I like how she is so nice and diplomatic when dealing with women who were outright rude and disrespectful to her. I believe what she says – it just makes more sense and sounds more honest than what the other women are saying. Mary, Lynda, and the hair stylist have already proven themselves to be liars on the show and in the blogs. So why should I believe their version of events?)

(Stacie’s blog isn’t up yet.)

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This entry was posted in BS Bravo Blogs, Catherine Ommanney, Lynda Erkiletian, Mary Amons, Michaele Salahi, Real Housewives of DC, Uncategorized and tagged , , . Bookmark the permalink.

18 Responses to BS Bravo Blogs: Cat, Lynda, Mary and Michaele

  1. Dreemz says:

    Finally! Someone who sees through that sickening sweet (I’m so classy)(I’m the IT Mom)(I’m mrs. Thang) facade of Mary!

  2. Pingback: Tweets that mention BS Bravo Blogs: Cat, Lynda, Mary and Michaele | -- Topsy.com

  3. tuzentswurth says:

    Mary should move to London with Cat where her attitude of… I’m better than you b/c I was born with a silver spoon in my mouth…..works. America isn’t supposed to have a class system but so obviously does. Mary needs to look in the mirror and see that she is just a woman with an apparent drinking problem. She always looks loaded. Mary might consider too that cabinet latches are for babies and toddlers. You are right RCH, Lolly is old enough to have learned to ask to borrow things. Fingerprint closet locks, Mary, Mary, whatever made you think that would be nice to share with the viewers?
    Michaele is too much like mindless KKB for me. There seems to be just large vacant areas where brains should be.
    Thanks for this blog, love your snark, I never would have read these w/o your commentary.

  4. Meg1964 says:

    I’m going to preface this by saying I know I can be a catty bitch sometimes…

    Now, with that out of the way – has anybody else noticed how bad Mary’s complexion is? It looks like she has scars from acne.. but who knows, maybe it’s years of throwing back wine.

    I assumed this to be another dig at Michaele . “The truth is, Michaele has known Lynda for years, has been a guest at her home, and at one point had a professional relationship with her as well”. What type of professional relationship? Is she saying that Michaele used to do Lynda’s make-up too? Or did Michaele work for Lynda at her *cough* modeling agency?

    • Haha!
      I assumed she meant Michaele did her makeup. I don’t understand what that story about Lynda knowing Michaele for years had to do with anything.
      “It’s ok to call someone an anorexic, as long as you’ve known them for years and they’ve been a guest in your home”.
      Is this more of that DC logic?

  5. game dressup says:

    that`s great, thanks

  6. Snarkella says:

    I am commenting from my Colorado vacation. Can’t stay away from your scathingly witty blog. Too much fun. How big a bitch does that make me? LOL. Don’t care. Keep ’em coming!

    Mary and Lynda are the two biggest bitches on the show. So fake. Cat and Michaele hilarious. Stacy–the token nice girl — yawn.

    • I don’t mind bitches, but I hate liars and fake people.
      Cat’s in your face “Bullocks!” bitchiness doesn’t bother me. I find it entertaining.
      But Lynda and Mary’s “I only gossip about you because I care” bitchiness pisses me off.

  7. free full movie says:

    Very good article, I really enjoyed it. Thanks!

  8. Tracy Hunley says:

    Spot on! Love, love, love this blog!

  9. Cae says:

    Does Lynda know she looks more anorexic than Michaele?
    Actually she looks like a kids dried apple craft project.

    Stacie your Mom did not abandon you she adopted you out. A child is a gift to adoptive families. Your Birth Mom does not owe you anything and you have no right to judge. Back off! Knock off the My Mom hated me because I am black crap!

    Michaele stop scamming!

    Mary you are a useless POS. Your Husband should stop acting like a macho jerk cause he is a wimp.

    Cat go to work and pay for your own insurance-That is the American Way!!

  10. BajaBabe says:

    Finally! Nice to find out others feel the same way! What is up with Mary’s skin? Once she starts drinking you can actually watch her get all puffy and blotchy while she is slurring her words! VERY DC classy!!!!

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